The Baby Sitter’s Race

THE BABY SITTERS RACE.  (Poet Lorikeet)

This brilliant poem, penned by my mate Bob Young, was read publicly at the Webb’s “Not the Moet lunch” held at their apartment on Hamilton Island on August 24 2011 .

It is all true!!

 THE CREW ALL SCRAMBLED ON THE DECK,

FIXED LINES AND SHEETS AND BRACE,

TODAY WOULD BE SO LONG AND HARD …

“THE BABY SITTERS RACE”

UNFORTUNATELY THE SITTER,

WOULD HAVE TO STAY BEHIND,

BUT HER MAMMARIES WILL LINGER,

IN THE WINDMILLS OF OUR MINDS.

TODAY A DEDICATION TO HER BEAUTY AND HER GRACE,

AND WE HOPE WE COME HOME VICTORS IN  …

“THE BABY SITTERS RACE”.

‘LOOK AT THIS’ THE SKIPPER SAID,

‘TWO LONG LEGS WE HAVE TO FACE’

IT’S LOOKING LIKE A CRACKER FOR …

“THE BABY SITTERS RACE!”

WE’LL HAVE TO WORK, NO TIME TO SHIRK,

ALL CREW TAKE THEIR PLACE,

NOW … NO MISTAKES, … TEAMWORK WILL WIN …

“THE BABY SITTERS RACE”.

WORK UP FIRST LEG TO STARBOARD,

THE NEXT LEG ROUND ON PORT,

KEEP A KEEN EYE OUT TO WEATHER AND,

MAKE SURE YOU DON’T GET CAUGHT.

BE CAREFUL WHERE YOU’RE LOOKING

AS YOU GO AROUND THE TOP,

BEWARE OF WISHFUL THINKING

AND FOR HER SPINNAKERS TO POP,

ELSE GROWN MEN’S EYES WILL WATER,

BUDS WILL LOSE THEIR TASTE,

IF ONE GETS CAUGHT ASUNDER IN …

“THE BABY SITTERS RACE”.

WE CROSSED THE START ‘BOUT MIDWAY,

AND SET A CRACKING PACE,

HERES’ A LIFT THAT SEPARATES IN …

“THE BABY SITTERS RACE”

THE WIND WAS UP TO TWENTY PLUS AND SUDDENLY A TACK,

A SUDDEN CALL OF STARBOARD …

A VERY QUICK TACK BACK.

A BLEAT FROM PETE,

‘RELEASE THE SHEET… NOW! …

THIS IS NO FUCKING JOKE’,

AND THAT IS WHEN, OF ITS OWN ACCORD,

THE BLOODY HALYARD BROKE!

THE SAIL DROPS LIKE KNICKERS

IN THE FRENZY OF LOVE AND LUST,

BUT WAS RAISED AGAIN IN SECONDS,

BEFORE YET ANOTHER GUST.

WELL DONE CREW, NO ONE WAS CAUGHT,

NO ONE’S YET LOST FACE,

THEY’RE PROUDLY THERE AND HOLDING UP …

“THE BABY SITTERS RACE”

TACKED AGAIN AND SCRAMBLED HIGH AS DB LOST HIS SEAT,

AND THERE HE IS PRONE LEEWARD …

HIS SCROTUM ON A CLEAT.

BOBBY GRINDS RELENTLESS, TALIA TAILS THE TRACE,

MAL’S EYES CARESS THE MAINSHEET IN …

“THE BABY SITTERS RACE.”

THE LAST MARK WAS MADE AND ROUNDED,

THE KITE HAD SHEET AND BRACE,

WE WERE FLYING HOME CLOSE WINNERS IN …

“THE BABY SITTERS RACE”

SUDDENLY … A BOUNCE OR TWO,

TOOK US BY SURPRISE,

THE KITE FLEW FREE … DAME AND DAVID’S’ POLE,

JUMPED UP TOWARD THE SKIES,

‘DON’T PANIC … WE CAN HANDLE IT’

‘BUT HERE’S ANOTHER TEST’

‘IF YOU LOOK A LITTLE SIDEWAYS,

SHE’S RUNNING … TWO A BREAST’.

SO LET’S KEEP IT ALL TOGETHER,

WE’LL MAKE TIME AND SAIL WITH GRACE,

AND APPRECIATE THE PLEASURES OF …

“THE BABY SITTERS RACE”.

SO, AS YOU SIT AROUND THE TABLE

AT THE … ‘NOT THE MOET LUNCH’

SALUTE THE BABY SITTER,

AND SALUTE HER AWESOME BUNCH,

DRINK DOWN YOUR GLASS WITH FERVOUR

DO NOT LEAVE A TRACE,

AND SALUTE THE ROARING THOUGHTIES OF …

“THE BABY SITTERS RACE”

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One Response to The Baby Sitter’s Race

  1. Pingback: The Baby Sitter's Race | Take only images….leave only footprints! | Baby Images

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